Mind games

Disarming soothe words,

Contrasting suggestions

Good cop and bad cop,

Preying on feeble minds.

Competing for attention,

Harnessing a range of dual emotions,

Repeating words and subtle suggestions,

Alternatively Loud and clear,

Feeble and unclear.

Rendering the intellect useless,

Putting emotions in turmoil,

Suppressing the souls voice,

Potentiating conflicts of the dual mind.

Slowly but surely overcoming resistance,

Conjuring a hypnotic trance,

Enslaving through habits and patterns,

Building a web of false beliefs.

Under the hood of varied pretexts,

Misusing sacred knowledge,

Utilising permutations and combinations of motivation and demotivation,

Confusing beyond limit,

Facilitaing the visualization of non-existent yet virtual images.

Auxiliary cause of endless pain and grief.

Misguided by half knowledge,

Unaware of all the root causes,

Lack of understanding of dynamic complexity,

Unaware of delayed unintended consequences,

Confidently making rapid strides into places,

Where Angels fear to tread.

Disturbing valuable balance,

Complicating interplay of natural systems,

Unknowingly striking at the core and,

Damaging the vitality of life.

Hiding under the garb of tradition,

or diverse justifications,

The mind tries to fool itself and 

Other minds,

A disservice to the self and to others.

Agony, pain and endless disharmony.

The ultimate act of compassion

A spiritual master hurts where it matters (hurts) most to awaken you from your slumber. To make you realise the delicate nature of life. To shed light on your blindspots. Help you realise your vulnerability, weaknesses, areas where learning is pending or needed. To make your realize that there is little time to learn and grow. Grab the opportunity while you can. 

Do not waste time. Direct tremendous effort on self improvement. Everything else is secondary. Become selfish for self development and growth.

Some may ask, where do I find such a master? True masters are always available. The question is are you ready to make yourself available to the master? Do you have what it takes to face the ego, end it's hold on you and take the driving seat in your life?

Mind games

 

Disarming soothe words,

Contrasting suggestions

Good cop and bad cop,

Preying on feeble minds.

Competing for attention,

Harnessing a range of dual emotions,

Repeating words and subtle suggestions,

Sometimes - loud and clear,

Sometimes - feeble and unclear.

Rendering the intellect useless,

Putting emotions in turmoil,

Suppressing the souls voice,

Potentiating and reinforcing conflicts of the dual mind.

Slowly, but surely overcoming resistance,

Conjuring a hypnotic trance,

Enslaving through habits and patterns,

Building a web of false beliefs.

Under the hood of varied pretexts,

Misusing sacred knowledge,

Utilising permutations and combinations of motivation and demotivation,

Confusing beyond limit,

Facilitaing the visualization of non-existent yet virtual images.

Auxiliary cause of endless pain and grief.

Misguided by half knowledge,

Unaware of all the root causes,

Lack of understanding of dynamic complexity,

Unaware of delayed unintended consequences,

Confidently making rapid strides into places,

Where angels fear to tread.

Disturbing valuable balance,

Complicating interplay of natural systems,

Unknowingly striking at the core and,

Damaging the vitality of life.

Hiding under the garb of tradition,

or other diverse justifications,

The mind tries to fool itself and other minds,

A disservice to the self and to others.

Agony, pain and endless disharmony.

नीड़ का निर्माण फिर-फिर, नेह का आह्वान फिर-फिर!

नीड़ का निर्माण फिर-फिर,

नेह का आह्वान फिर-फिर!

वह उठी आँधी कि नभ में,

छा गया सहसा अँधेरा,

धूलि धूसर बादलों नें

भूमि को भाँति घेरा,

रात-सा दिन हो गया, फिर

रात आई और काली,

लग रहा था अब न होगा

इस निशा का फिर सवेरा,

रात के उत्पात-भय से

भीत जन-जन, भीत कण-कण

किंतु प्राची से उषा की

मोहनी मुसकान फिर-फिर,

नेह का आह्वान फिर-फिर!

वह चले झोंके कि काँपे

भीम कायावान भूधर,

जड़ समेत उखड़-पुखड़कर

गिर पड़े, टूटे विटप वर,

हाय, तिनकों से विनिर्मित

घोंसलों पर क्या न बीती,

डगमगाए जबकि कंकड़,

ईंट, पत्थर के महल-घर;

बोल आशा के विहंगम,

किस जगह पर तू छिपा था,

जो गगन चढ़ उठाता

गर्व से निज तान फिर-फिर!

नीड़ का निर्माण फिर-फिर,

नेह का आह्वान फिर-फिर!

क्रुद्ध नभ के वज्र दंतों

में उषा है मुसकराती,

घोर गर्जनमय गगन के

कंठ में खग पंक्ति गाती;

एक चिड़या चोंच में तिनका

लिए जो गा रही है,

वह सहज में ही पवन

उंचास को नीचा दिखाती!

नाश के दुख से कभी

दबता नहीं निर्माण का सुख

प्रलय की निस्तब्धता से

सृष्टि का नव गान फिर-फिर!

नीड़ का निर्माण फिर-फिर,

नेह का आह्वान फिर-फिर!

--- हरिवंशराय बच्चन.

Dispassionate state

Progressive detachment arising out of a cogent, coherent, convergent, unbiased, clear, real, unbiased perception; balanced, holistic and experiential understanding of the self, the world and reality as is. This process takes place parallely and progressively with increasing awareness of the self, one's true nature (Dravya, Guna, Paryaya). This evolution of the self in parallel to detachment from others is truly a dispassionate state.

Unlearning and learning

Growth expects both unlearning and learning.

Unlearning habits, patterns, blindspots in the light of awareness (Pragya). 

Learning in the light of holistic experiential understanding (as it is).

Meeting each unfolding moment afresh, 

Merely present as a knower,

A choiceless, unbiased, mature, contentful, settled experience of the present moment while still anchored on the soul.

Gradually, unhurriedly and gracefully receding away from the mundane and proceeding confidently deeper towards the soul.

Meeting the self and settling down within.

Live for yourself

"They will criticize you for what you are, for what you are not, and for what they think you are.

They will judge you for what you do, for what you don't do, and for what you fail to do. They will talk about you for what you say and for what you keep silent about.

They will point at you for your successes and for your mistakes, for your decisions and for your doubts. No matter how much you try to please, there will always be opinions.

So, live for yourself, because in the end, the only thing that matters is being true to your own path."

HARRISON FORD

Source of all sorrow

31 August 2023 The wrong belief that: 1. I will feel better or will be more happier if external circumstances change is the source of all sorrow. 2. I will feel better or will be more happier if people behave in a certain/particular way. 3. My current state of health/motivation/wellness is influenced by others is the source of all sorrow. 4. Helping and facilitating others will facilitate/help me is the source of all sorrow.

Flow and response

Respond when the question is asked. Only when essential. Neither before not too later. No hurry....think before you leap.

Blink away the emotions, thoughts,

Smile away, dive deep within.

Find your flow (Gyandhara distinct from Karmadhara) and stay within.

Unconditional

Unconditional understanding,

Unconditional awareness,

Unconditional friendship,

Unconditional trust,

Unconditional love,

Unconditional forgiveness,

Unconditional experience,

Unconditional living.

Revival

Suppressed amongst the cunning and intellectual,

Unsure amongst the confidently ruthless,

Disoriented amongst the dubiously composed,

Demotivated amongst the deliriously driven,

Lost amongst the self proclaimed sure and clear.

After a relentless onslaught of inner and outer conflicts

The voice of the soul now alienated from the self,

Stripped of its identity, 

Unbeknownst of its true might,

Plunges down a bottomless spiral.

Alone, weak, and estranged,

Discredited and disconnected,

Silently watchful in the shadows,

Hurt and disenchanted,

Coloured by the many judgements,

The subdued soul nearly loses hope.

An accidental revelation,

A wave of realization,

An epiphany arises from the paradox,

Reignites a nearly burnt out fire,

Revives the dwindling faith.

Enlightened and invigorated,

The soul discerns and realises it's own nature,

It's separation from the crowd,

Embraces the truth as it is,

And discovers bliss hidden in plain sight.

Blissful breath

I searched far and wide,

Explored different parts of the world.

Toiled night and day,

To afford mundane experiences.

I loved, wooed, pursued and cared for,

Family, friends, and beloved,

To experience and savour,

fleeting moments of happiness.

I strived to overcome prejudice,

To live fairly and with honour,

Treating Foes and friends alike,

Presuming that I would be treated likewise.

 

I observed wide gaps between

Perspectives and perceptions, 

Intentions, actions and outcomes,

Futile and often blind pursuits

of an elusive dream.

Reality rudely shook me time and again,

Day in and day out,

Making me realise how habits, patterns and blindspots,

Influence and overpower one and all.

One ordinary day, 

I accidentally stumbled on myself 

Experienced my ownself,

The bliss of each breath,

The joy of aloof attention,

A lively awareness,

A simple yet profound experience,

My freedom from the crowd,

A quiet celebration every moment, 

Moment to moment.

Breath to breath.

On the eve of Mother's day, A beautiful poem written by Nora Bateson called "Mama now.”

"Mama now.”

Your eyes will see the derailing of assumptions,

Your hands will hold the crumble of the old matrix.

I do not have any authority to lean into.

I have empty pockets where parents used to advise their children.

I don’t have any maps, myths, or mother wisdom for you.

I can fix your breakfast, but not the culture.

When you ask about how to be a good person, I cannot lie to you.

Everything you touch in a day is in some way bloodied.

You’ve been born into an edgeless violence.

But I will not judge or measure you against a bygone metric.

I am here too, ready to learn with you, unsure how to be or who to be.

I can only read fragments of your worry,

As the future is a horizon of confusion, I cannot protect you,

And yet it is my only job.

Aching as I witness from this side of the hourglass,

other generations of parents’ new outlines, school, career, family, and retirement,

but your life will be another shape entirely forming in the fractures.

When you say you need a goal, I offer you an expired ticket.

Superficial memes roll off the tongue right into your bullshit detector.

Success in the existing system is not gonna do you much good.

Your integrity is your rage, and I will nourish it.

Your dignity is your curiosity and I am tiny beside it.

Your courage is your pain and I will sing to it with you.

We will riot together.

We will notice the nuance of small graces in the day,

We will wash the grip of loss for each other.

I am your mama and your future is the story of a storm.

I am your cabin, your boots, your rucksack.

Source: Post on Amplifying cognition

Tum mujhko kab tak rokoge

मुट्ठी में कुछ सपने लेकर , भर कर जेबों में आशाएं

दिल में है अरमान यही , कुछ कर जाएं , कुछ कर जाएं।

सूरज सा तेज़ नहीं मुझमे , दीपक सा जलता देखोगे

सूरज सा तेज़ नहीं मुझमे , दीपक सा जलता देखोगे

अपनी हद रौशन करने से

तुम मुझको कब तक रोकोगे,

तुम मुझको कब तक रोकोगे..

मैं उस माटी का वृक्ष नहीं , जिसको नदियों ने सींचा है

मैं उस माटी का वृक्ष नहीं , जिसको नदियों ने सींचा है

बंजर माटी में पलकर मैंने मृत्यु से जीवन खिंचा है

मैं पत्थर पे लिखी इबारत हु , शीशे से कब तक तोड़ोगे

मिटने वाला मैं नाम नहीं,

तुम मुझको कब तक रोकोगे ,

तुम मुझको कब तक रोकोगे..

इस जग में जितने जुल्म नहीं उतने सहने की ताकत है

इस जग में जितने जुल्म नहीं उतने सहने की ताकत है

तानो के भी शोर में रहकर , सच कहने की आदत है

मैं सागर से भी गहरा हु ,मैं सागर से भी गहरा हु,

तुम कितने कंकड़ फेंकोगे

चुन चुन के आगे बढूंगा मैं,

तुम मुझको कब तक रोकोगे,

तुम मुझको कब तक रोकोगे..

झुक झुक कर सीधा खड़ा हुआ , अब फिर झुकने का शौख नहीं

झुक झुक कर सीधा खड़ा हुआ , अब फिर झुकने का शौख नहीं

अपने ही हाथों रचा स्वयं , तुमसे मिटने का खौफ़ नहीं

तुम हालातों की भट्टी में जब जब भी मुझको झांकोगे

तब तप कर सोना बनूँगा मैं

तुम मुझको कब तक रोकोगे

तुम मुझको कब तक रोकोगे

तुम मुझको कब तक रोकोगे….

Poem By-Vikas Bansal

Learning opportunities across lives

Rising and falling,

Waxing and waning,

Conscious but hardly present,

Arcs of larger circles,

Loops and convoluted journeys,

The vicious cycle continues unabated.

Archetypal cycles,

Yet each an opportunity to learn,

Highlighting gaps in understanding,

Bringing to the foreground -

subconscious patterns and blindspots.

मी तुझ्या साठीच मृत्यो आणली ही जिंदगी,तूच दे शिक्षा तिला रे माजली ही जिंदगी

मी तुझ्या साठीच मृत्यो आणली ही जिंदगी,

तूच दे शिक्षा तिला रे माजली ही जिंदगी.

वचनेशी प्रेम केले हा म्हणे माझा गुन्हा,

जे नको ते, आज मजला बोलली ही जिंदगी.

मार्ग सत्याचा धरुनी आजवर चाललो, 

साधना केली खरी पण त्यागली ही जिंदगी.

तीच ती नाती नव्याने गोड बोलू लागली,

संशयाने मग पुन्हा धास्तावली ही जिंदगी.

Looking inward

Looking inward, finding oneself or becoming aware of the self who is separate from others souls and other objects.....

Anchoring on the self while interacting with the world......

Reducing the outward focus and redirecting the effort inward to remain centred within.....

Finally settling completely within.

How does one reach this  destination or attain this elusive goal?

What is the process? 

How can one do this efficiently without getting lost or demotivated on the way?

It is an art. The art of knowing the self and settling in this blissful knower state. It involves the following steps:

1. Firm realization and faith that my happiness lies within me. It cannot be achieved through any external means of any form. Neither physical body, food, clothing, physical or emotional intimacy, family, relatives, friends, wealth, achievements, designations, nor owning any material things. This will become clear when one deeply reflects on all past experiences and the sum total of all related life lessons. Contrary to our prevailing belief the purpose of all these myriad experiences is to make us understand the eternal truth that happiness is within the self. Realizing this truth leads to detachment. Of note here is that detachment occurs gradually in most cases. 

2. Clear understanding that my current state/mode is temporary, and it can be transformed. My true blissful nature is separate and can be attained. It is not impossible and there exists a process for the same. 

3. There exist others (Siddha) who have attained a blissful state. 

4. The soul is just experiencing the prevailing circumstances by getting overtly involved in them (oneness belief). In reality, prevailing circumstances, other souls and other objects are completely separate from me. They can neither cause an effect on me nor can I influence them in any way. Thus Bheda gyana is the most critical step after unwavering and consist faith in the souls true nature.

5. Current state/mode is an outcome of a habit/pattern. Belief that my current state is my permanent state --> Searching for happiness outside oneself--> getting involved in diverse experiences, believing in wrong theories/concepts/people under the  presumption they will impart lasting happiness --> Only to realize that they hardly provide any happiness at all. Rather they harm the soul in myriad ways and take it further away from its goal.--> going around in circles, eventually feeling completely lost. 

6. Detaching from everything and everyone else and redirecting interest within, taking meaningful and intense efforts at understanding the soul, it's true nature and then gradually and consistently taking efforts to remain within the soul. Over time this process takes place effortlessly. One realizes one's true nature and attains it permanently.

The lost art

We are bombarded with a lot of information every wakeful moment of our lives. Our mind rushes through the information (like a computer reads data) superficially without ever processing it resulting in a grave loss. Few of us take the time to pause, reflect, contemplate (map to current state of understanding/mental models, update both) and assimilate or incorporate (update existing mental models or form altogether new mental models)? 

Even if some of us do it, most importantly, How many of us are conscious and aware while facing the next challenge? Do we subsconsciosly repeat a  pattern/habit? Or do we consciously utilize the revised/new mental models, look at the presenting moment with a holistic and detached perspective, take genuine effort to overcome habit/patterns by trying newer and better ways of responding to the situation at hand?

Unconscious habits/patterns of thinking take away a major portion of our time in life. For those who have a glimpse of their own habit/pattern (loops of thinking/behaviour),  struggle to breakfree without being aware of the appropriate process to do so. Consequently both cases lead to deep disatisfaction, unhappiness, inability to connect with others and form meaningful relationships as well as, learn and apply new things.

Walking the path

We frequently feel lost, insecure unsure/uncertain, confused, not sure what we want, where we are going and how we will manage. We then tend to brood, think in unending loops on related topics. 

When we face a real world situation, we are plagued with what-if scenarios and resultant dilemmas like what path/option to choose, which path is best, will it will lead to what I really want, will I find what I have been searching for. 

Finally, after a decision is made, we tend to evaluate whether we took the right decision, what if the choice was wrong, what would be the unintended consequences, how to handle them? Moreover we are also concerned about the short term and long term outcomes, repercussions/consequences.

Whew! some much thinking....before, while making and after taking decisions.... so much unwanted anxiety, stress....and persistent, never ending noise.....

We focus on the past, the future and all possible potentialities/possibilities which may never actually happen. Paying precious attention to the minds unending game. Simply put we are looking at the wrong place for answers, we are paying attention to the resulting unending chatter and then getting stuck in the loop until it becomes a habit pattern. Once there we do not know how to wriggle out of the rabbit hole. It is easier to get sucked in but difficult to get out when you do not know the art of getting out.

Self-help Gurus, Friends, Relatives, Neighbours, Guides, Mentors share tips, guidance, and feedback. But actual implementation is a different ball game altogether. The nuances are to be discovered as you walk the path. 

Walking the path is different from knowing the path... you might encounter startling and unexpected experiences on the way. You might feel like being all alone in a dark tunnel, confused, lost, helpless, when you begin treading the path.....a roller coaster might be a better metaphor.

When you start out you feel you have a large support group but you soon realise that few remain to accompany you, and frequently, none that you can turn to.

No one tells you where to look and what to focus on. People will share ideas on how to equip yourself, how to prepare, how to handle yourself, how to keep the morale up. But the actual effort involved is completely different and frequently mind boggling.

To make matters worse, the outcome or experience at the end of the tunnel would be unexpected or may not meet your expectations. Bitterness, alienation, heartbreak, depression are common unintended consequences as you can seldom recover to the original state (one that existed before embarking on the journey). 

So ending the above seemingly unending, possibly unnerving explanation, here are some pragmatic pointers:

1. Be ready for dynamic and at times substantial changes to perceived outcomes.

2. Hang in there when the going becomes tough. 

3. Silence helps focus on seeing the unending thoughts, permutations and combinations of suggestions/possible paths of action.... Just see them rise.....dissolve and disappear when you do not act on them. (You will get the hang of this over time)

3. If you do end up acting/reacting to a thought that sounded so true and aligned with your state, embrace the resulting situation. 

4. Do not resist it and it's outcome. 

5. Apologize immediately if the situation demands. Make amends where needed. 

6. Take rest, step away if needed. 

7. Seek guidance before it becomes really complex and ends up in a mess.

8. Spiritual insights on the real nature of the world helps alleviate the pain.

9. Change your perspective to see the journey as a learning experience.

I know these are broad suggestions but self management will be unique to each person, his/her environment and the issue at hand.

Overcoming narratives

Kanjiswami in his landmark pravachan of 1950 said:

1. Determine where you are making an error

2. Know that it is transient and you can overcome it

3. A systematic logical method exists to attain your own divine self, and 

4. Arihantas and Siddhas who have attained their divine souls through this path have existed, currently exist and will exist in the future.

I am thankful to him and many others to help me understand the following error:

I am not the narrative unfolding in the mind. I am just watching it, though too immersed and engrossed most of the time that I get confused unable to discern the illusion from the reality. I end up believing in thoughts, constructs and mental models that are a far cry from reality. Next, under the influence of this misbelief I take action. Thus deluded, I end up getting lost in a web of my own unconscious doing.

The narrative (Vani~speech) is meant to auto correct and direct me on the right path when I have deviated from it. The body mind and this speech are instruments but they should not over power my souls will.

Deviated upyog, deviated drashti, Deluded thinking, deluded beliefs lead to bondage. Ruchi paltav, Ruchi anusari virya.

Redirect Ruchi (interest) Drishti ka vishay (object of interest) and Upyog (attention) inwards. This is the most important purusharth. 

For over thinkers, Listen to the sounds, watch your breath to first ground yourself. Listen to music, sing....anything that redirects your attention away from overthinking process. Detach from the active narratives, then direct attention to the right direction which is aligned with your values and your goals. Go with the flow. Do not get deviated by ishta and inishta. If at all a irrelevant thought arises just watch it, observe it. Do not get pulled into it, do not get attached to it, do not over dwell on it. Do not try to avoid it. Just watch and it will dissolve on its own. 

Remember Kanjiswani's teachings about the soul, and step back in appropriate flow. Strengthen the Drishti in right direction (inwards), remain within, with practice this process will  become simpler and easier. You will be able to get back on track easily with time. Gradually remain more and more in Swa samay. 

Samyak darshan will eventually follow. Do not hurry. Once there, then comes the real challenge - sanyam. 

Irony

It is an irony to see:

An immortal being worried about mortal wounds,

A being capable of multidimensional awareness struggling to discern it's own inherent nature while under the illusory influence of the world.

A being capable of attaining Omniscience living with limited intellect,

An eternally blissful being on a futile pursuit of momentary happiness.

I might have erred....

I might have erred by:

perceiving that following the heart was important than following the mind,

Being empathetic was better than being harsh and insensitive,

Being there and accomodative was better than being cold hearted and calculative,

Forgiving was better than the long route of retribution,

Preferring talent and experience over qualifications,

Preferring learning over following outdated, out of context and rote tradition,

Preferring my own freedom and respect of others over subjugation,

Preferring a mutual win-win over trying to win at the cost of others loss,

Preferring appropriateness over right and wrong,

Preferring goodwill over manipulation, 

Preferring mutual respect over superiority and inferiority,

Believing that being considerate is more important than blind heartlessness,

Believing compassion is more important than reasonless indifference,

Preferring living and learning over mindless surviving,

Believing in myself rather than blindly following others,

Believing that aligning with the self is more important than taking sides,

Believing in the sacredness of life over  mechanized regimens,

Some might label these as feelings and emotions, or deluded thinking,

They are free to do so,

I see it as a rich, experential, grounded lesson that helped me learn the truth from mass illusion.

I see a path unfolding for me,

As an observer and a knower, 

And just being blissfully present.